Everyone is getting spring fever and ready for another school break. Yes, we did just kinda, sorta, had one a couple of weeks ago. But my kids remind me it’s not completely a vacation when we take school books along. Even if it is a reduced schedule.
I need a break too. Not just from homeschooling.
If you follow my blog any, you know about my son’s diagnosis of sleep apnea. We believe that is what causes several other issues we’ve had concerns about for years. We had another sleep study this past week. We had such high hopes that the surgery he had in February took care of everything. I can see a world of difference in him!! Yet, the doctor called me the very next day with bad news. It’s still severe. And we have to do one more sleep study next week. My son (and I) hate those. I wish I could tell him it will be the last one. But I made that mistake when we went to the very first one. And we’ve had three since then. 🙁 He is taking this very hard. After all, he is a teenager and just wants to be “normal”. And as his mother, I am terribly afraid of all of health complications that could result from it being untreated.
This week, I’ve also been heartbroken for three friends of mine. They all don’t know each other but all in very similar situations as the devil attacks their families. It’s just grace and God that we are not under the same attack. I am completely broken for them. I don’t know what I can say or do to make it any better. I’m not sure how to forgive someone that hurts anyone in my family. I pray I never have to be put in that situation. I get angry when another kid carelessly says hurtful words to any of my kids and way after my own children have forgotten about it, I am still reminded every time I see the person. How do you get beyond the pain when someone deliberately caused harm to own of your children, forever changing the course of their life?
Last Saturday, we went to a funeral of a young man. I know his parents. They are some of the sweetest people I’ve ever known. Their son was needlessly killed in a accident. The other driver left the scene but did turn himself in the next day. He was also young. Two young men whose lives are forever changed in a split second – one ended and the other pretty much did, too. Plans, dream, hopes. They all died for the other young driver as my friend’s son slipped away from this life.
This weekend was our church’s annual ladies’ conference. I can’t remember a year I missed. Until last year. My best friend (who lived almost four hours away), begged me to come. We also always spend the time catching up. I knew I would see her quite a bit over the summer and I had a lot of commitments going on at the time. Just a few weeks later, she passed away unexpectedly. I will always regret not going. I went one night this year. It was so difficult to sit there without her beside me. This year’s speaker was a lady we used to talk about wanting to see in person. She never got to. I had to go because I know she would want me to. I try not to think much about her death. If I do, I get angry. And I can’t allow myself to feel that.
I am having to learn that bad things happen to good people. That’s not easy to understand. I guess I don’t need to understand it at all. I just need to trust.
And that’s slowly happening.